As Worthless as Your Penis

It's quite amazing how much I don't care about your penis. It's downright worthless, a risible little piece of flesh that dangles between your legs and attempts to make decisions for you. And you, my dear, are just as worthless as your cock. Allow me to illuminate your feckless existence in basic, plain English because I know that you won't understand half of what I'm saying: you're too busy jerking yourself as I call you names. If you love my vicious, intelligent humiliation, then get ready for your regular dose of venom.